Understanding the Rights of Husband and Wife in Islam
Every important social role comes with certain rights and duties. Marriage is a highly valued duty in Islam. Young Muslims are encouraged to take it as a priority. Since marriage forms the foundation of a family, Islam treats it as an exceptionally important subject. Islam clearly defines the rights of husband and wife in the Quran and the Hadith.
The Quran tells us:
“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” [Surah Ar-Rum 3-:21]
The Hadith also encourages Muslims to get married early and take on the responsibilities of raising a family.
The Messenger of Allah said to us: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding chastity, and whoever cannot then he should fast, for it will be a restraint (wija’) for him.'”(Sunan an-Nasa’i, 3209)Spousal rights form a significant topic in Islam, and the Holy Quran discusses the rights and duties of spouses in detail. Marriage is not an ordinary matter.
Therefore, Islam clearly defines the rights of both husband and wife. In this article, we’ll discuss these rights in Islam with respect to the Quran and Sunnah.
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The Concept of Mutual Rights in a Marriage
The union of two people in marriage is a mutual relationship that has to be handled with mutual respect, equality, and honesty.
Allah (SWT) says in the Holy Quran, “They are clothing for you, and you are clothing for them.” [Surah Al Baqarah 2:187]. This verse indicates the close connection and relation between the husband and wife, and greatly encourages harmony between them..
In an Islamic marriage, both the husband and wife have specific rights and obligations that are outlined in the Quran and teachings of the Prophet (ﷺ). For a couple to have a healthy and successful relationship, they must understand and fulfill these rights toward one another. Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) stated, “The best of you are the best to their families, and I am the best to my family. When your companion dies, then do not abuse him.” (Sunan al-Tirmidhī 3895)
The Rights of the Husband in Islam
In Islam, a husband’s rights include the expectation of mutual respect, love, and intimacy. One of the Islamic rights of a husband is that the wife should not permit anyone he dislikes to enter his house.
Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “It is not lawful for a woman to observe (voluntary) fasting without the permission of her husband when he is at home; and she should not allow anyone to enter his house without his permission.” (Riyad as-Salihin,282)
A good wife is promised great rewards in the afterlife.
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “Any woman dies while her husband is pleased with her, she will enter Jannah”. (Riyad as-Salihin, 286)
Another Hadith Guarantees Righteous Women an Entry in Paradise:
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ): “If a woman prays her five (daily prayers), fasts her month (Ramadan), guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be said to her: ‘Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.” [Mishkat al-Masabih 3254]
Islam expects women to be obedient to their husbands.
Abu Huraira told that when God’s Messenger was asked which woman was best he replied, “The one who pleases [her husband] when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he disapproves.” (Mishkat al-Masabih, 3272)
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The Rights of A Muslim Wife
Islam gives women the right to choose their husbands for marriage.
Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as having said: A woman without a husband (or divorced or a widow) must not be married until she is consulted, and a virgin must not be married until her permission is sought. They asked the Prophet of Allah (ﷺ): How her (virgin’s) consent can be solicited? He (the Holy Prophet) said: That she keeps silence.(Sahih Muslim, 1419a)
The wife has financial rights over her husband, such as mahr, accommodation, and money to spend on them. The obligation of mahr has been stated in the Quran as: “And give the women [upon marriage] their [bridal] gifts graciously. But if they give up willingly to you anything of it, then take it in satisfaction and ease.” [Surah Al Nisa 4:4]. The rights of a wife also include care, concern, and kindness. Husbands are not to oppress or overburden them with work.
According to a Hadith:
Mu’awiyah bin Haidah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I asked Messenger of Allah (ﷺ): “What right can any wife demand of her husband?” He replied, “You should give her food when you eat, clothe her when you clothe yourself, not strike her on the face, and do not revile her or separate from her except in the house”. [Abu Dawud, who categorized it as Hasan]. (Riyad as-Salihin, 277)
Husbands are expected to give a sufficient amount of money to their wives and children. The rights of a Muslim wife involve living prosperously while spending her energies in strengthening the family.
According to a Hadith:
“It was narrated that ‘Aishah said: ‘Hind came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyan is a stingy man and he does not give me enough for me and my child, except for what I take from his wealth without him realizing.’ He said: Take what is sufficient for you and your child, on a reasonable basis.” (Sunan Ibn Majah, 2293)
Men are also encouraged to physically help their women with work, just like Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ), who used to help with house chores. I asked `Aisha “What did the Prophet (ﷺ) use to do at home?” She said, “He used to work for his family, and when he heard the Adhan (call for the prayer), he would go out.” (Sahih al-Bukhari, 5363)
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An Islamic Insight into Resolving Marital Conflicts
Marital conflicts can destroy a marriage. While disagreements are natural when two people share their lives, constant unresolved conflicts can slowly tear a relationship apart.
Such situations must be dealt with patience and kindness.
“Sahl b. Sa`d reported that a person from the offspring of Marwan was appointed as the governor of Medina. He called Sahl b. Sa`d and ordered him to abuse `Ali. Sahl refused to do that. He (the governor) said to him: If you do not agree to it (at least) say: May Allah curse Abu Turab. Sahl said: There was no name dearer to `Ali than Abu Turab (for it was given to him by the Prophet himself) and he felt delighted when he was called by this name. He (the governor) said to him: Narrate to us the story of his being named as Abu Turab. He said: Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) came to the house of Fatima and he did not find `Ali in the house; whereupon he said: Where is your uncle’s son? She said: (There cropped up something) between me and him which had annoyed him with me. He went out and did not rest here. Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) asked a person to find out where he was. He came and said: Allah’s Messenger, he is sleeping in the mosque. Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) came to him and found him lying in the mosque and saw that his mantle had slipped from his back and his back was covered with dust and Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) began to wipe it away from him (from the body of Hadrat `Ali) saying: Get up, covered with dust (Abu Turab); get up, covered with dust.”(Sahih Muslim, 2409)
Anger is one of the most powerful weapons of the Shaytan against us. It is highly encouraged to work on anger management as it may lead to destroying the couple’s relationship. The best way is when one of the partners is angry, the other one should keep themselves calm and not respond immediately. A man said to the Prophet (ﷺ) “Advise me.” He (ﷺ) said: “Do not get angry.” He repeated his question several times, and He (ﷺ) said, “Do not get angry.” [Riyad as-Salihin 48]
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Conclusion
Islam has mentioned several duties and responsibilities in a marriage that must be fulfilled.
The rights of husband and wife in Islam are clearly outlined in the Quran and the Hadith.
Marriage (Nikkah) in Islam is a relationship whose witness is Allah (SWT) Himself. Therefore, it’s the husband and wife’s moral and spiritual obligation to follow Allah’s commands (SWT) and ensure mutual bonding and respect in the relationship. Muslims are expected to treat their spouses with utmost respect and kindness. By developing a good understanding of each other’s rights, we can fulfill one of our most important duties and qualify for many eternal rewards.
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